Oh, what i'd give to spend a day with Rodney Dangerfield and Morrissey. I don't think the coupling would be harmonious but I'd have a great time. A battle of negativity. We would rendevous at a Brewsters Fare type pub, and the two would introduce themselves. "I am human and I want to be loved!" Morrissey would whine. Rodney would chuckle "What a childhood I had, why, when I took my first step, my old man tripped me!". I'd watch with glee while Rodney orders a bloody steak, eyeballing the waitress while Moz would faint with disgust into the playzone, only to be smothered by multi-coloured balls. Rising up shouting "heifer whines could be human cries!" the word "heifer" inciting Rodney to make a joke about his ex-wife. Morrissey would then take off on his circa 1956 Raleigh muttering "the world won't listen". Rodney would then ask where the nearest 'Hooters' bar is with a wink, after insulting a nearby patron who hears him cry "That girl is so ugly. The last time I saw a mouth like hers it had a hook on the end of it." Reality has broke me from my strange reverie. I'm having morning coffee with Natasha Kaplinsky and Patrick Kielty. Grunt.